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03.10.2018 16:22
but this one is unique,It feels hollow but I think we were playing Antworten

Editors note: In June, several weeks after leaving Washington, Isaiah Woods-Renfro announced on Twitter that he was changing his last name to Woods, to honor his maternal grandfather.Isaiah Woods most important contribution to college football came not from a touchdown catch in November but from a tweet in May.On the night of May 29, Woods posted a message on his Twitter page: This is me taking steps in the right direction to becoming myself again.In the 398-word disclosure that followed, Woods described the most difficult year of his young life. How he lost his love for football, which had brought him to Washington?as a wide receiver. How he struggled to get out of bed, and how it got so bad, I didnt want to wake up at all. How he soon learned the reasons why: depression and anxiety.Woods revealed why he missed spring practice after a true freshman season in which he had appeared in every game and made 13 catches. He had been hospitalized while learning how to cope with the lowest of lows. Woods noted his fear of failure and hatred of quitting, and then added that for his own health, he needed to step away from football and from Washington.At first, I was just going to make a general statement that you see, like, I want to thank the program and everything, but I will be stepping away from U-Dub football, Woods said. I wrote it out, and I was looking at it and read it over a couple times, and I was like, No, this isnt me. Its too generic. If Im going to do this, I want to be truthful to myself and honest to everybody else. And then I thought about the other people out there who could be dealing with this but dont want to come out because of the stigma.I was like, OK, Im definitely going to post this.Woods isnt the first major college football player to encounter mental health obstacles. But in sharing his story, he hopes to help others facing similar challenges to find their way, whether it leads them back to the field or not.A descent into darknessThe anxiety started soon after Woods arrived at Washington in 2015. He now knows that difficult times in his childhood probably contributed, but it was the setting, being away from home, along with the stress of college football, that triggered his symptoms.The panic attacks didnt come until later in the season, usually during road trips. One struck him on the bus as Washington went to its hotel before a game at Oregon State.I have asthma, but a panic attack feels like you really cant breathe, Woods said. I remember putting my head on the seat in front of me and trying to catch my breath, trying to slow my breathing down. By that time, it was too late. The last thing I remember is being on the bus and then waking up at the hotel.The symptoms come to college football players in different ways. Clemson offensive lineman Jay Guillermos?symptoms worsened after he broke his foot midway through the 2014 season. Depression pushed him away from friends and loved ones and toward alcohol. His weight ballooned to 365 pounds, and he?left school after Clemsons bowl game to seek treatment, yet returned to start on the Tigers team that reached the national championship game last season.Former Iowa State offensive lineman Jacob Gannon had his first panic attack during a September 2014 practice and quit on the spot, walking off the field. Although he returned weeks later, after receiving an anxiety diagnosis and a treatment plan, he still had a few attacks, including one on the bus ride to a game at Oklahoma State.Woods hid his struggles from teammates and others in his inner circle. Mark Serve, one of Woods high school coaches and a man he calls Uncle, recalled receiving fewer calls and texts from Woods. He initially attributed it to the typical college transition but became concerned when Woods called less despite getting more playing time, making him wonder: Why isnt Isaiah more excited?You think its growing pains or theyre homesick and theyll get past it, said Woods mother, Chieko. Its like, Tough it out. Kids kill for this opportunity. Why would you want to throw it away? Youve worked so hard. But he just wasnt the same kid. He wasnt my son. He didnt have that same spirit, that same energy.In November, he called me, and he was like, Mom, you dont get it.Confronting the problemChieko urged Isaiah to contact Cassie Pasquariello, Washingtons sport psychologist. Isaiah was reluctant at first, but after suffering a panic attack the night before a game at Arizona State, he met with Pasquariello.The first time, it was kind of silence, Isaiah said. I didnt want to say anything. She was just asking me questions. After the first session, I was good, though. The next time we met, I started talking.She broke it down, what Im dealing with: depression and anxiety.Woods and Pasquariello began meeting regularly. He finished the season. His grades remained strong. Washingtons coaches fully supported him. But despite the counseling, Woods still struggled to get out of bed. On the morning of March 28, he participated in Washingtons first spring practice. That night, Pasquariello took him to University of Washington Medical Center, where he spent the next week receiving treatment.He was going to his sessions, it was like, OK, were getting somewhere, Chieko said. He was still going to school, he was on the honor roll, doing really well. Everything was fine, and then I get a call from work from him and the doctor.It was devastating.Woods learned how to better cope with his symptoms.At first, it was kind of weird, Woods said. Youre not at home, youre not in a dorm. Youre just in a hospital, and thats where youre staying now. But it was very helpful, honestly, to meet with doctors every day and map out a situation. Like, if this happens, what are you going to do? Are you going to fix the situation or change the situation and get yourself out of that mood?Kind of game-planning for your life.Woods learned how to slow down his thoughts and his breathing when a panic attack came on. He was encouraged to use exercise as a distraction.After Woods left the hospital, he started waking up without anxiety. He was nervous to see his teammates, because only two knew about his hospitalization. But they welcomed him back, offering help without judging him.I was pretty surprised, Woods said. It just felt good to have that brotherhood. That time is when I felt most loved.A difficult decisionAfter being released from the hospital, Woods met with Pasquariello, Washington wide receivers coach Bush Hamdan and Huskies head coach Chris Petersen to discuss the next steps. Woods had options, including redshirting the 2016 season, but the coaches didnt pressure him to return.The entire conversation, Woods said, was about me feeling better. Petersen and Pasquariello declined to be interviewed for this story, citing the private nature of the situation, but Woods and those close to him repeatedly praised Washington officials for their response.Any parent wants their kid to go somewhere to have that support, Chieko Woods said. Theyre not just a football player. Theyre a kid. And theyre somebodys kid. Thats what meant the most to me.Colleges are becoming better prepared to handle mental health issues with athletes. In March, the NCAAs Sports Science Institute published Mental Health Best Practices for its member institutions.The document notes that estimates of mental health incidents among college athletes are relatively similar to those among non-athletes. It also outlines procedures for identifying possible mental health conditions and referring athletes to qualified practitioners, and includes mental health screening surveys.Its on the upswing, said Marty Martinez, a psychologist at Iowa State who has helped Jacob Gannon, basketball star Royce White and other Cyclones athletes facing mental health challenges. Theres a lot more awareness on the part of ADs and university presidents that theres a great need for this and a responsibility.Woods received the support he needed at Washington, but had to decide whether he wanted to remain there and on the team. The decision consumed him, but in a good way.Away from the college football grind, he had time to process. He thought about how he no longer woke up anxious, rushing off to the practice field or the weight room.I realized that I didnt really have the passion for football anymore, Woods said. If I played, I was scared I would be in the same situation. I would just start the whole cycle over again.The pursuit of happinessWoods decision initially didnt sit well with those around him. Chieko, Serve and his best friend all wanted him to stay at Washington. When Isaiah returned to Los Angeles, Chieko saw him shut down a little bit, and they rarely spoke.He eventually began to open up. Mother and son talk like they used to. Chieko knows depression is a day-to-day process, and shes careful not to bombard Isaiah with mental check-ins.Woods lives a simple but stable life, living with his mother and 5-year-old sister, Charli. As part of his agreement with Chieko, Isaiah continued to take classes at Santa Monica College. He also works at an ice cream shop in Venice. His co-workers provide a team feel, and talking with customers helps him with his depression.He just needed to be able to take a step back and hit that reset button, step away from football, Chieko said. I know Isaiahs such a talented football player, but in the end, I need my kid to be healthy. Hes never been able to have a life. Its always been push, push, push.Isaiah still talks with Pasquariello, and theyre working to find a therapist near his home. He hopes to enroll at Cal-State Northridge this fall. Several junior colleges have reached out about playing football, but Woods is pursuing other interests, like fashion. He recently launched his own line of hats, called Wavegod.The slogan: Surf your own wave.We probably talk more now than we ever had, Serve said. Going through stuff like this can take you one of two ways. You can completely tank and all of a sudden become this hermit, or you can find ways to rediscover yourself. I definitely think its helping him. Hes growing up faster.Its a different guy, not different as in bad or completely different. Its a better version of himself.Finding his voiceIf football isnt in Woods future, his career stat line will look like this: 13 games, 13 receptions, 178 yards and one essential conversation started.His May 29 tweet has received almost 500 retweets and more than 1,700 likes. He continues to receive direct messages from those who have heard his story.Ive had to take a minute to step back and be like, Wow, because I really didnt expect any of it, Woods said.After the tweet and Woods appearance on SportsCenter, other Washington students reached out and told him how his story helped them with their own mental health struggles. Football players he knew at other schools praised his courage.He reached out and touched a lot of people around the world that deal with those things, Washington tight end Darrell Daniels said. He just opened up another side that people dont see in football players. That was a great thing.Clemsons Guillermo had a similar response after sharing his story of facing depression. As the clock wound down during a game last season, an opposing lineman asked to speak with him afterward.The lineman told Guillermo how depression had consumed him, and how grateful he was that another player spoke out publicly about the issue.Mental health is one of those things that has a bad stigma, especially in sports, and its something that needs to change, Guillermo said. It takes peoples lives every day. Its not just college football. Its college students, any athletes. Its everyone.But I do think its getting better [with] stories like this that people can read and know theyre not alone. It made me so proud, even if I helped that little bit.Chieko said she hopes Isaiahs story also inspires parents. After Isaiah went public, she heard from many parents on Facebook who described similar issues with their kids.We could have had an open forum and gone through this together, Chieko said. Kids are getting stressed out and killing themselves. There are options. Parents need to know its OK to talk about it and not be embarrassed.Isaiahs May 29 message concludes with: This isnt the end of me, just the end of a certain chapter. I will conquer this, and not let the situation conquer me. Im on a journey to find my happiness again.The journey is ongoing. As Guillermo notes, Depression doesnt just go away. Its not like a cold.But Isaiah Woods is headed in the right direction again.I wake up in the morning feeling better, he said. Im more motivated in general, things I want to accomplish. I would say Im back on track, but I feel like Im better than that.I feel like Im in a completely different space than I have been in my life.ESPNs Chantel Jennings contributed to this story. http://www.giantsrookiestore.com/Giants-Ereck-Flowers-Jersey/ .Y. -- Sabres forward Drew Stafford has witnessed plenty of turmoil during his eight seasons in Buffalo. http://www.giantsrookiestore.com/Giants-Robert-Thomas-Jersey/ . According to a report from the Winnipeg Free Press, the Bombers will name Acting GM Kyle Walters to the post full time. http://www.giantsrookiestore.com/Hoodie/ . 31, the CFL club announced Monday. The team also has yet to decide on the future of Doug Berry, who began the season as a consultant to the head coach but took over the offensive co-ordinators duties in July. http://www.giantsrookiestore.com/Giants-Jonathan-Casillas-Jersey/ . All of the scoring came in the final 20:04. Lucic scored on a power play at 15:46 of the third period, when he tipped a shot over Stars goalie Kari Lehtonen for a 3-1 lead. http://www.giantsrookiestore.com/Giants-Eli-Manning-Jersey/ . The Browns coaching search remains incomplete. Cairns Taipans have launched an appeal against the NBLs decision to award Brisbane victory after their match on Sunday was abandoned with just over a minute to go due to a blackout.Obviously there are lots of consequences, a loss, points spreads, the series. It could have a massive impact down the stretch, Taipans coach Aaron Fearne said.We have the ability to appeal and that is what we will be doingThe Taipans were trailing by eight points with 1:37 remaining in the game when the Cairns CBD suffered a blackout, plunging the Convention Centre into darkness.Officials tried desperately to restore power, but after half an hour the decision was made to abandon the match.Under FIBA rules, if a match is unable to be completed for any reason, the team that holds the lead is awarded the victory.The NBL has confirmed it will conduct a full review into the appeal on Monday.Bullets coach Andrej Lemanis wasnt overtly pleased, but couldnt begrudge the outcome.Well wait and see what happens with that (Cairns appeal), but the rulles are the rules.dddddddddddd I dont make them so well take the win no problems, he saidIts unusual, when youve been around for a while you feel like youve gone through a few situations, but this one is unique,It feels hollow but I think we were playing well enough, my confidence is we were going to win that game anyway.Fearne admitted it would have taken something special to turn the match around in the time remaining, but he would have backed his men to do it.We would have had to make some huge plays, but Ive been involved in some games where that is exactly what we did, Fearne said.Bullets import Torrey Craig, whose first game against his former club was overshadowed by the drama, said it was just good fortune the lights had cut out when they did.I thought they were going to turn back on to be honest, but it is what it is, Im happy we had the lead when the power went out. 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